You're certainly not supposed to lose control. That's not considered respectful. And so not to drink to excess. And excess as evidenced by your behavior. That's how they judge whether it's excessive or not. And so pace yourself. And don't drink more than you need to. And if you don't drink. Be consistent and just say I don't drink. And while they initially may give you a hard time about that, they'll let it go. It's understood. But if you say that you don't drink, don't go then and drink.